Some of the best emails are the ones from the library letting you know a hold is in. You give a tiny squeal of glee and once the workday is over you are free to zip to the library, march up to the circulation desk and claim your quarry. The hard part is finding the time/a quiet place to actually read the chosen book. This can also be a bit hard when you’re on a budget and that particular book is just ready to leap off the shelf at Target and come home with you, even if you’ve just spent the bulk of your bank account on prescriptions. And other people are posting about it on Goodreads and Instagram.
Crying in H Mart was certainly on my list. Confession I have never been to a H Mart. K-mart yes. A few local Japanese and pan-Asian markets to get my Japanese Green Tea Kit Kat fix and a crack at the full Lee Kum Kee range for my pitiful attempts at amazing recipes online. I saw H Mart, memoir and was in.
Last week I got the happy email and finally had Crying in H Mart in my little undead racoon paws. Now I’m An Old who spent an entire day playing the newest Duran Duran and New Order singles back-to-back on Spotify. I recently figured out Nicki Minaj sings the song with the “twinkle twinkle little star” refrain. Insert my brother laughing himself into a choking fit over my LIKED SONGS Spotify playlist. Pitbull’s Hotel Room Service is perfect escape music no matter what Andy says. So safe to say I’ve never heard a single Japanese Breakfast song or even read Michelle Zauner’s New Yorker essay which spawned Crying in H Mart.
I’m a genius like that.
Book looks good put it in the library bag/wish list.
Trader Joes frozen food item looks good? Stick in it the cart.
Brain cells and sodium levels be damned.
I do wish I had probed a bit deeper into Crying in H Mart before reading. I spent more time trying to track down soup soy sauce this summer before my blood pressure hit GIRL YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE A DAMN STROKE LEVELS. I think TRIGGER WARNING is what people use on places like Reddit. Yeah, I’m a Redditor. Because certain material hit me in a deep, still unhealed corner of my soul after over twenty years.
I lost my mother to cancer and while the time between her final diagnosis to her death was very brief it was still searing. She died at home. I can tell you when her death rattles first started, what I was reading and what it felt like to wake up hours later to learn she was gone. I know what it’s like to frantically try and find something anything your loved one can choke down, the almost unicorn hunt and making something to have it rejected barely touched. Michelle Zauner had a much more prolonged road to travel.
Crying in H Mart is good solid memoir of growing up between two cultures and the struggles of mothers and daughters. The scenes in Korea are my favorites and I would love a Lisa See level deeper dive into the family past. Michelle’s father is a character and could have a whole book devoted just to him but the tiny details of her maternal family are the real draw. I want to know more about the older generations, especially her aunts.
Would I recommend Crying at H Mart? Yes, with a big trigger warning. Her mother’s death is brutal and if I had not had a similar experience at about the same age I would have stopped reading right then and there.
You might be stronger.
But it’s something to consider.
Crying in H Mart isn’t all sadness and death. There is joy and strong family ties even if an ocean separates people. Give it a read.
whiskeytangowendymarie.com 