What’s next for the Santangelo clan now that Lucky’s avenged her father and the slain Dario and Marco? Well, if you think Gino the Ram is going to shuffle off to The Villages and play canasta while waiting for the Early Bird dinner or that Lucky’s going to renounce men and Marvin Gaye records you’re a) insane or b) Blacklight. Actually Blacklight would be all “What? Lucky who? Papa Gino’s pizza? Huh?”

Luckily…heeheehee…Jackie Collins doesn’t leave us hanging. Because Lucky, the next book in the Santangelo saga named after everyone’s favorite feline dusky beauty is a peach! Gino the Ram gets ensnared in the gold digging claws of Susan Martino (widow of the comedian Tiny Martino who loved to lose his salary at the Mirage tables in Chances). If Dlisted.com had existed back in the 1980s Susan Would have been Hot Slut of the Day AND in the Gold Diggers Hall of Fame. Because girl brings a wheelbarrow AND shovel.

Think Miss Lucky DOES NOT LIKE THIS? Do I have a Starbucks addiction? Is Stephen Thompson (creator of The Onion’s AV Club, Pop Culture Happy Hour panelist and raised by nerds) my secret, don’t tell Blacklight NPR boyfriend? (Blacklight: “Umm…it’s NOT A SECRET! Wait…he’s the one with the vintage video games and from The Onion? Cool….”).

Yeah…so Lucky isn’t a happy camper. Then again, neither is the sexy, dirty blond comedian Lenny Golden. He’s got girl trouble, career trouble and can’t seem to get a sexy, feline like beauty out of his head. And also at the life kinda sucks table is Lucky’s old school friend Olympia (think Christina Onassis). Being a pretty Greek heiress with huge bewbs and millions upon millions might buy you all the coke in the world and get you laid but it can’t buy you skinny.

In best Jackie Collins fashion, there are, scandals, drugs and love triangles galore! Love triangles off the top of my head: Gino/Susan/Paige. Susan/Gino/Money. Lucky/Lennie/Marco’s ghost. Lucky/Olympia’s dad/Lennie. Lennie/Lucky/Olympia. Lucky/Olympia’s dad/Francesca. Olympia/coke/food.

Will Lucky end up with Lennie? Will Olympia and Flash (think Zombie Keith Richards) make it? Will Gino learn Susan is a stone cold GOLD DIGGA? Will Paige keep her legs shut? Will Gino and Lucky reconcile? Will Lucky go to jail for a murder she didn’t commit?

Rest assured everyone bad gets theirs. Lives are changed. Marvin Gaye is grooved to. Drugs are snorted. The booze flows. It’s not Shakespeare. What Lucky is like any good Jackie Collins novel is an escape into a glittering world written by someone who has actually been on a private plane or three and partied with the high and mighty and the people on the slide. You can sit back on Mr Couch and think “wow, I’m glad I’m not Olympia. Or my husband might not be world famous but at least he’s not a junkie monkey like old Flash there…” If you need an escape or just want to reveal in the 1980s goodness Lucky is a helluva time machine!